Whack-A-Mole is Better with Friends

I just wanted to take a minute to say something.

I've been struggling lately with a lot of different things. Nothing really serious, but just issues that continue to pop up again and again like a twisted game of Whack-A-Mole. It seems like no matter how hard I play, there's always another ugly little mole popping its head up, just when I thought I had it under control.

There have been moles of unexplained sadness, moles of doubt. Moles of spiritual emptiness, isolation, and unfulfilled longing. Moles of not feeling well and not knowing what's wrong.

Freaking moles. All over the dang place.

I hate them.

This is a hard game to play. I've never had very good hand-eye coordination.

Something woke me up last night and I ended up unable to get back to sleep for a while. I wasn't feeling great. My stomach was off yesterday (after lunch at my most favorite place, which just makes me sad) and frankly, I've been tired of the fighting stupid moles all the time. I felt so, so tired. And alone. And desperate for relief.

A thought occurred to me.

Maybe I should share what I have been going through. I've been trying to bash down the Mole of Isolation a lot lately, but it keeps popping up. And it is lonely. I'm tired of being alone.

I decided to take a chance and confide in some people that I care about, explain what's been going on.

I was scared to be vulnerable. I was afraid of telling the people I care about that I am having a hard time. I don't want to upset anyone. I tend to be a person that brings laughs. I like that about myself. I like to laugh and make others laugh too. So it was a little scary to tell my friends that I'm struggling. I wasn't sure how they would react.

I am so glad that I did.

It felt...like a weight had been lifted.

My friends are so, so caring. They are such lovely people. I can't believe it took me so long to become vulnerable. I think that I have been withdrawing, unconsciously, for a while. I don't want to do that anymore. That's not me.

So that's the truth. I am struggling with some things. Some days I feel great, I've whacked all the moles, and I am winning the game and tickets are flying out of the machine faster than I can fold them. Other times, I feel overwhelmed, like the damn mallet is broken and all of the moles popping up simultaneously arnd just leering at me. I am having a bit of a hard time.

It feels good to say that. To admit it. To come clean, to be vulnerable. It's scary, but it's good.

I know I am not alone. I guess part of me always knew that, but by intentionally reaching out to my friends, I was reminded that they really are always there for me.

It feels...like I've passed out the Whack-A-Mole mallets so that they can help me with this stupid game.

And you know what that's like, right?

When you're playing Whack-A-Mole and then your friend comes up and starts helping you by pummeling the moles with their hands? So that you are both working together, helping each other to beat the moles?

You can get so many more of the little buggers that way.

The game gets so much easier.

The same is true for life. For struggles.

You can do it alone, probably. You might be able to get by. Maybe you've got quick reflexes.

But it is so, so much easier and so, so much lovelier to allow others to come alongside you and help you when you need it. To share your struggles, your vulnerabilities. To lean on the people you care about.

So, my friends, I am holding out a mallet for you. Thank you for taking it, and helping me with the moles. I love you. I don't know where I would be without you.

Please know that I am always here for you as well.

My reflexes aren't great, but I'm ready to help you take a whack at your struggles in return.

We've got this.

Together, we can make it through this.