Lots of Thoughts

It is January 2nd, 2017, and I have a lot of thoughts running around in my head that need out. I've tried writing these things out in an organized fashion but it is not working. I've decided just to spew them all out at once.

It's a brain dump!

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I am SO glad I'm not throwing up any more. Yesterday was possibly the longest day of my life. I think I felt every single minute of the day. The 3 hour car ride was definitely the longest car ride I've ever been on. Thank the Lord for the wonderful Emergency Room with its kind nurses and bags of fluids and free pants and anti-nausea medications. So, so grateful.

I have been wanting to write a post about NaNoWriMo but I haven't been able to get it just the way I want it. I have several drafts just about NaNo, which is crazy. I don't know if I'll ever get one finished. In short, I LOVED NaNo and I think I'll continue giving it a try each year. What a wonderful experience. And no, you can't read my book yet. I still haven't read it. I'm a little afraid to.

One thing I learned about writing this year is that it doesn't have to be for a purpose. Writing for the sake of the writing process is a completely valid hobby. Writing needs to be practiced just like other hobbies and abilities. Writing can become a habit, as it did for me during the month of November. I love writing, so very much, and I hope to continue growing as a writer simply by writing more. Will I ever have a book published? Maybe. Maybe not. I need to keep working at it.

I am so, so grateful that we moved into this house. I am so glad we found it. I am so glad that all of our other offers were rejected. This house is just what we need right now and I am looking forward to loving it and living in it and making it ours as the year(s) continue. Hopefully we can figure out how to do that without exceeding our budget.

2017 sounds kind of futuristic to me. Tim will be 30 this year. I'll be 31. That's how old my parents were when I was born. The kids will be 6 and 9 by the year's end. That sounds crazy!

I love being 30. Something about turning 30 has given me the confidence to be who I am with less fear about what others think about it. It's great and powerful. I am great and powerful.

I have wonderful people in my life. I am grateful for friends who do puzzles with me and send me random pictures of cats and babies and their faces throughout the day. God bless Snapchat. I love you, friends. I love that I can have hour long phone chats with my sister. I'm grateful for all the people who listen and laugh and love me and play games with me and stay up late talking to me. It takes a village to raise an adult too, y'know.

I love our church and our Life Group especially. I didn't realize I needed to see all your faces every Wednesday night, but I do.

I have had four giant bottles of Powerade today and I finally cut myself off and switched to water. Rehydration, people. It's a serious matter. I ate a bowl of chicken soup for dinner and longingly looked at Lydia's pizza while she longingly looked at my soup. I think Lexi would be jealous of how many Saltines I ate today. I can't wait to eat more food tomorrow.

Life is all about ups and downs. Ups and downs. I mention them in just about every reflective piece of writing I create, and I finally GET it. THERE WILL ALWAYS BE UPS AND DOWNS! Downs suck, but they make ups more beautiful. Ups are great, but you wouldn't appreciate them without the downs. I am a very optimistic and positive person and I have grown through the ups and downs that 2016 brought my way.

The beginning of the year 2016 was kind of hard. There were some challenges There were some really hard moments where I wondered if I would make it through, and how I would make it through. There were some scary times that haunted me. I watched a LOT of TV.  Like, a LOT. It was kind of my way of dealing with hard things. My brain attempted to sabotage me, but I got the better of it. HA! I'm forever grateful for my amazing therapist who pointed me toward the medical professional I needed to get things sorted out. Brain health needs to be talked about without stigma. The brain is an organ that needs care just like like all the other organs in the body. My brain requires some medication to work properly, and that is OK. I feel so much better now than I did a year ago.

The middle of the year was characterized by transition. Changes. The end of the year was good and busy and full of people and love. I got into the habit of writing regularly and now I struggle to stay current on my TV. Yeah, Trump got elected, but I think we will be OK. At least we know SNL will have a lot of material to work with, huh? Gotta look on the bright side. Gotta keep fighting.

Kate McKinnon and John Oliver crack me up. New Girl and Brooklyn 99 are my favorite shows. I'm not current on This Is Us, but I'm loving it. Thank you, entertaining people, for entertaining me.

I have a gym membership and I know how to use it.

I'm really enjoying teaching again.

I love Spotify. When my 3 months of Premium end, I am going to be really disappointed. 90s music makes me so happy.

We are going to get that hole in the kitchen floor taken care of, folks. Sooner rather than later.

I put up multi-colored Christmas lights in my puzzle room and I am excited about it. Christmas lights make me happy and I don't care if they are tacky, Tim. Love you.

I am apparently in a very grateful and positive mood. I guess feeling better after feeling bad will do that to you.

2016 is over and done, 2017 is fresh and new and full of possibility. I mean, starting off the year violently ill was not how I pictured it, but that violent illness has already made me appreciate being able to keep liquids down, something I take for granted daily.

Ups and downs, my friends. Ups and downs.

The Wall - Video Blog

When we moved into our new house, we immediately had a half wall removed. Now I need help figuring out what to do with the space. I decided to try a video blog so I could show you the space without having to take and upload a bunch of pictures. Let me know what you think!

35 Thoughts on Moving

We've been in our new house since last Tuesday and I am loving it! Moving is a huge pain, but I did end up getting over 22,000 steps on moving day, so that's something to celebrate I suppose. We're still getting things organized and figuring out how to arrange the rooms, but I feel like we've made a lot of progress. I love having more space. I haven't had to clean it yet so we will see if that feeling holds. I think we are going to be happy here for a long time to come. 

I haven't been blogging as much but I have been working on some short stories (actually managed to finish one, which is something I struggle with!) but I wanted to take the opportunity to record my feelings about moving. No pictures this time but I think I'll take some good ones once things are a little more settled. 

For now, here are some random thoughts I've had since moving...

1. It is nice to not be able to hear every word everyone says from any location in the house.
2. I don't have easy access to a Super Walmart or neighborhood market anymore.
3. I need more bathroom stuff.
4. There are somehow fewer cabinets than we had before.
5. Walking into a closet is cool!
6. There are many more places to hide from the children than before.
7. I should have purged a LOT more stuff before packing it up...
8. I use the computer a lot more now that it's on the main level.
9. The basement is virtually empty because we don't have enough stuff to fill it.
10. Paying movers was expensive but totally worth it.
11. I really miss my old (new) dishwasher. Might need another new one.
12. What if we traded in two crappy fridges for one good one?
13. This location makes it a lot quicker to get to church!
14. I thought I might cry when we left but I definitely did not.
15. I do miss having my own bathroom. Now I have to share with Tim...
16. This microwave is a different wattage from the old one and that makes a difference.
17. With all these neighbors how is it that there's only one kid close by?!
18. It seems that the patio is going to be a bigger pain to fix than we originally thought.
19. Music makes everything better. I tip my hat to YouTube and Spotify.
20. I have a puzzle going and it is not interrupting dinner!!!
21. I hope we live here for a long long time.
22. I learned more about our highway system yesterday than I have in my entire life combined.
23. I think it's going to be much easier and faster to get to work now.
24. Except for Tim, it'll take him much longer.
25. Furniture is expensive.
26. I have no idea where to put the homeschooling stuff and I can see myself moving it a lot.
27. I wish I had more money to make the place perfect!
28. Hiccup is completely insane. (OK, that's not related to moving but it is definitely true)
29. There is carpet under the table and that makes me uncomfortable. 
30. More ceiling fans would be cool! Haha.
31. I find myself shopping at the same stores as before despite the fact that they are far away now.
32. There are tons of boxes in my in-laws' garage and I do not want to deal with them.
33. It's amazing to think that the idea of moving popped into our heads on Mother's Day and here we are, in a new house!
34. I definitely feel my life coming full circle as I'm now down the street from my elementary school and my high school workplace. I'm not fancy enough to actually live at Lakeview but it would be interesting if I ended up there somehow. 
35. More space means more places to stow junk that should be confronted and dealt with. 

Transitions

Transitions kinda suck.  I don't have any living room furniture. The only chairs to sit in are at the kitchen table.  My butt misses the recliner. There's no good place to read to the girls.  Blaaaaaah.

I am ready to be moved into my new house, with furniture and space. I am so excited to start a new journey. The waiting in between this house and the new house is hard. Transitions are hard.

It's been a while since I've lived in a season of transitions. In the 8 years we've been married, we've had a lot of them. Transitioning from a couple to parents. Transitioning from being students to being "adults". Transitioning from being renters in Lawrence to homeowners in Overland Park. Tim transitioning from one job to the next. Me transitioning from a full time student with a toddler at home to a full time, stay at home mom of two. 

There were several periods in the past 8 years where I had no idea what my day to day life would look like in 6 months or a year. I didn't know where we would live. Then I didn't know where I would student teach, or whether I would teach in my own classroom. Tim didn't know where he would work. It was a season of upheaval. There was a lot of wondering and uncertainty and worry about what was to come. And while there have been some hard patches, there have been a lot of very good times. Overall, I feel very blessed. 

So, I feel very certain that things will be OK. I do believe it will all work out, like it has in the past. I believe that there are good things in store for me and for my family. The waiting is hard. It's hard to have a lot of my belongings packed up. I went to watch Ghostbusters (my favorite movie, the one I've historically watched for comfort) the other night only to discover that I have no idea where it is. I made do. I'm sure it's somewhere.

I've spent too much time worrying about small, trivial things. What will our new neighbors be like? What if there are kids who are bad influences on ours? What if a table won't actually fit in our kitchen? Where am I going to put two litter boxes? Will we have enough money? Will I buy an Overland Park or a Lenexa pool pass next summer?  What if our buyers back out on closing day? What if we end up homeless? Blah, I can't wait to worry about more important things. 

Despite all these (pretty ridiculous) questions without answers, I do feel peace. This time of transition is hard, but it is fleeting. It won't last forever. Before long, we'll be in a new home figuring out what our new normal looks like. I know there will be bumps along the way. But I think it will all be OK.  

I'll have shelves to put books on, my comfy bed to sleep in, and a recliner of some kind to sit on. I'll make sure of it! A couch for reading books to the children. My kids will be able to ride their bikes. We'll have space to invite people over. Lexi will have a real bed instead of just a mattress on the floor.  I will spent some time helping Lydia purge even more stuff and organize what's left so she doesn't cry every time I ask her to clean her toys up. We'll get our new homeschool room unpacked and ready and we will get into a routine again. We will get there. We can survive this weird time, and we will. We've done it before. We've done way worse before, if I'm being honest. We'll be just fine. 

Only 38 days to go! I'm ready.

May Update

I've been working on a blog post for a long time. Today, after I finished it, I realized that I didn't even want to skim it to proof read before posting. Which made me realize that if it's that boring, I probably shouldn't post it. So I scrapped it and decided to write a general update instead :)

The Franzen household has been a busy one lately!

About two weeks ago, we adopted this adorable little guy, Hiccup.

After much deliberation, I decided to look for a new home for Luna, who, out of anxiety, had begun peeing and pooping on the floor daily.  That very same day, I found a young woman who had recently moved out on her own that was looking for a cat. It was bittersweet to drop Luna off with her, but I think it was best for everyone involved. I'm happy to no longer be cleaning up messes every day, Luna is happy to not be terrorized by Arya and the children, and Tim is happy to have a new kitty who loves him rather than being terrified of him like Luna was.

Arya and Hiccup play with each other all the time. Arya often tried to attack Luna and Luna would hiss at her or run away. If Arya jumps on Hiccup, he rolls around with her. He'll chase her tail and she'll lick his head. I haven't heard a single hiss from the two of them, which the vet said indicates angry fighting. They rough house constantly but seem to be enjoying it. I'm crossing my fingers that one day they may snuggle with me simultaneously. It's the crazy cat lady's dream.

The girls and I have wrapped up school for a while. Our enrichment center had its official last day yesterday with a fun field day and celebration. We've had a blast being a part of that community this year! I am going to enjoy taking a break from planning for a bit to recharge, but Lexi has already told me she's bored and wants to do school again. Sigh. We're working on some summer reading lists and we'll see what else we end up doing. I have some lofty goals but it's going to be a busy summer so if we just end up playing, swimming and reading a bunch, I'll be cool with that.

Lexi and I earned our blue belts in karate this week. I never thought signing Lexi up for this class would lead me to loving martial arts, but that's where we are at! We've both learned a lot, gotten some great exercise, and had a blast doing it. We plan to take the summer off and get back into it this fall.

The biggest news is that we're looking into selling our house and moving! Tim has been looking forward to "upgrading" for a while and when I sat down to crunch numbers, I realized that all his hard work at PHLY has paid off and we're in the position to do it! This is an exciting and scary endeavor. I love our house and beautiful yard to pieces but looking at houses is a lot of fun and I feel like the time is right for a move. We're going to work hard making some updates, packing, and cleaning and we're hoping to have our place on the market by the end of June. Of course, if you're looking for a great place in Overland Park with 3 bedrooms, 1.1 baths, a 2 car garage and a great yard...you know where to find me ;)

Overall, I'm excited to see where this summer takes us!